For those who did not need the lesson on repentance, thank you for sticking with me. Hopefully this information will be put to use at some point in ministering to someone’s needs in your life. Today we are going to look at what we are to do after we have confessed our sin to God, agreed with Him about the very nature of our sin and chosen to turn from it. If you have other sin in your life besides any level of sexual sin, today’s lesson can be applied to it as well. I want to continue talking about the process of restoration. Please understand by no means is the process I’m describing here the only path towards restoration. This way has just been my experience and I came out healed so I know it was successful.

Once confession and repentance have taken place, we need to seek forgiveness from God and possibly others as well. I highly encourage you to seek a godly counselor to walk you through any recovery needed. Having just fled sin, the process of the season to follow will find you extremely vulnerable. Your emotions will more than likely be screaming and the temptation to go back to the life of sin might be overwhelming, especially if it called for you to break off a relationship.

Have you ever experienced seasons of overwhelming temptations to look back? If so, what kinds of emotions were involved?

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When we choose to leave a season of sin, particularly sexual sin, you will never be more vulnerable to falling back in than the period right after you leave. You see, when we become soul-tied to someone other than our husbands, or husbands to be through any level of sexuality, we form an unhealthy attachment. If you have sinned physically with the other person, you became one flesh with them. Think about it for a moment. When God created the covenant marriage, He said the two would become one flesh by coming together sexually. Please look at the NIV version of Genesis 2:24. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” God’s plan for the two to become one flesh would happen through the intimacy of sexual union. Please look at the NIV version of 1 Corinthians 6:16. “Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, ‘The two will become one flesh’.”

As you reread the scripture, substitute the words “a prostitute” for “anyone outside of a covenant marriage”. What is that scripture saying to you?

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It is my belief through studying the scriptures that every time you come together sexually with someone other than your spouse, you become one flesh together. No wonder it is so hard to leave a relationship with someone whom you have slept with. You became one flesh and now the flesh is being “ripped” apart when you try to leave. That would be terribly painful! Girls, God knows the pain and devastation we will feel when we give ourselves away sexually, that is why He continues to warn us to flee sexual immorality.

Having confessed and repented, we need to seek forgiveness from God and possibly others.

We cannot fully grasp God’s mercy and grace through His gift of forgiveness. It’s something I don’t think I will ever fully understand. How a God could love us so much that He would take our place on the cross that we belonged on for our sin is beyond me. Amazing, isn’t it? Let’s look at what God has to say to us when we choose the path of life, repent and ask for His forgiveness.

Please read the following. Hebrews 8:12. “For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more.”

What does it say God will forgive? __________________________________________________________________

What does it say He will remember no more? __________________________________________________________

It says that he will forgive our wickedness and remember it no more. Let me share what the actual definition of wickedness is according to the Merriam Webster online dictionary. It means, “Morally very bad.” Have you ever done something morally bad? Perhaps you are currently doing something immoral. If we are all being honest, everyone could answer “yes”. Isn’t it awesome that we have a God who will not only forgive us for awful things, but will not remember them as well? What a precious gift He has given us!

Please take a moment to think about something “bad” you have done in which you already sought out forgiveness. If you have already asked for forgiveness, God doesn’t even remember it. Isn’t that awesome? How does it make you feel to know He has no memory of your sins that have been forgiven?

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If you have repented from a sin but have not asked for God’s forgiveness, would you consider doing that now? I will help you get started.

Father, I come before you now seeking your forgiveness for ___________________________. I am in agreement with you over this sin and want to be washed clean from it. Please take it from me now, and restore in me whatever needs to be healed. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Now, here is an important thing to remember. Once you have been forgiven, the enemy has a way of coming along and trying to convince you that you really have not been forgiven. It is critical that you choose to believe God’s word that He has forgiven you and to not allow your feelings to be manipulated. Do not listen to your heart when it tries to tell you God really has not forgiven you and you need to ask for forgiveness again.

Beloved, does your heart ever try to tell you one thing while your mind is telling you another? If so, give some examples.
 
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Remember, the Bible tells us in Jeremiah 17:9 that the heart is deceitful above all things, it cannot be trusted.

If you perhaps have repented from an adulterous relationship and people nearest to you are angry with you because of your sin, don’t be surprised if the enemy takes an opportunity to slime you through hurting people. I have seen this happen with people who have fled from an ungodly relationship.

When we are walking out our restoration and believing God that He forgives us and is restoring us, there very well might be people in your life that take an opportunity to slime you. Should you find yourself in that situation, please remember that when we ask for forgiveness God wipes our slate clean. Your emotions will be raw and I want to encourage you not to receive any condemnation from outside sources.

Dear one, if you have hurt someone because of your sinful ways and sought forgiveness, don’t fall into the deception that you should be punished by the party you have hurt.

If you have done your part and humbly sought out their forgiveness, it is there’s to give. If they are unwilling to forgive you, remain humble in their presence and realize that you cannot make them forgive you. Release them to God and pray for their hearts to be changed. We cannot make anyone forgive us. Our job in a situation where we have done the hurting is to ask for their forgiveness and remain humble even when they won’t give us that gift. I want to encourage you that if you have people in your life that you have hurt and you have not attempted to make amends, seek godly counsel on how to go about doing it correctly.

Sisters, there may be someone in your life that refuses to forgive you. I know personally how painful it is when you have asked for someone’s forgiveness and they are unwilling to give it. My advice to you is to pray for them, bless them through prayer and release them to God. Should you ever need to approach them again to ask for forgiveness, wait on the prompting of the Holy Spirit. We never want to cross boundaries. We should always ask permission to speak into someone’s life, especially when we have hurt them. Sometimes they are not ready to hear our apologies. We need to respect that and never force our words on someone else. Even when we just want to give someone advice, we should always ask permission to do so first. This is respecting their boundaries.

Perhaps you can relate to having someone in your life that has not forgiven you for an offense, take a moment to write a personal prayer for that person.
 
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Many people in our world try to take a measuring stick and rate different sins. I have personally heard someone call adultery the “unpardonable sin”. Girls, all sin grieves the heart of God. Do you believe that we all stand equal at the foot of the cross as sinners? Why or why not?

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I strongly believe that at the foot of the cross we all stand at the same level. Murderers, adulterers, and thieves will all be right there next to the jealous, envious, and prideful. Yes, when we all approach the throne of grace, he loves us equally, and forgives us the same. I heard something interesting on the radio the other day. A lady called in on the program and said, “Have you noticed in the Bible that God never dealt harshly with the sexual sinner? He only dealt firmly with the arrogant and prideful.” What a God of grace we have that he approaches sexual sinners gently.

The Bible teaches that there is no sin too great for God to forgive. Please read the following scriptures and write next to them in your own words what the Holy Spirit is saying personally to you.

In 1 John 2:1-2 it says, “But if anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the father in our defense-Jesus Christ, the Righteous one. He is the atoning sacrifice for our sins of the whole world."

David committed what we in our world tend to see as one of the “worst” sins that can be committed; adultery and murder. David was truly sorry for his sins and he knew his actions hurt many people. But because he repented of them and sought God’s forgiveness, He mercifully forgave him. No sin is too great to be forgiven by God. Do you ever feel there is something you have done that is too terrible to be forgiven? If you answered yes, please explain why you feel that way.

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There have been times in my life when I felt this way. I believed a lie that I could never have a good life because of my poor choices. Perhaps you struggle with forgiving yourself over a particular sin you committed. I know about that one all too well. I think I shared in an earlier lesson that God showed me if He was big enough to forgive my sin, who was I not to? In essence, I was placing myself above God! I had to repent from the sin of pride.

Even though I felt that I shouldn’t forgive myself, I knew I needed to. My feelings are always trying to get in my way! I have had to learn not to bow down to my feelings. It has been such a struggle. I began to tell myself, “I forgive myself” until my feelings caught up with truth. Feeling forgiven really can be a reality. We just have to choose not to bow down to them when they tell us otherwise.

God will always forgive us when we humble ourselves before Him and seek His forgiveness. God forgave David and although David suffered horrendous consequences, God still restored his life. He will do the same for you. Do you still carry shame over a sin you committed years ago? It doesn’t matter what you did, you do not have to carry around the guilt and shame. God wants to carry that load for you.

Have you ever noticed how we ask God to forgive us for something then we find ourselves asking for forgiveness again for the same sin as if he didn’t hear us the first time? Why do we continue to look back at what God has forgotten? If we believe His word to be truth, then we need to stop looking in the rearview mirror.

Will you consider committing to God that you will attempt to stop looking back at what He has already forgotten? Will you commit that you will stop trying to remind Him of what He doesn’t even remember? If you struggle with forgiving yourself, would you ask the Holy Spirit to help you do so? Psalm 121:2 says that our help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth. Let’s commit these things to Him and cry out for His help. I don’t know about you, but I so desperately need it!
 
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Precious sister, trust that you are forgiven even when your feelings scream otherwise.