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I am so glad you are back today. Some of us are in need of an extreme makeover, would you agree? We won’t be visiting the plastic surgeon to get the kind of makeover we need today. They can’t do the kind of makeover I’m talking about. Sorry ladies, I’m not talking about facelifts, implants, Botox! The kind of makeover we are going to get today will
be a spiritual one. Be sure to grab your shovel and bring any shame you have been toting around. You are going to need to bring it in order to drop it off once and for all. Are you ready to go? We are heading to the graveyard so let’s get going.
I would like to continue our topic on shame today. Sisters, we have to choose who we will bow down to. Is it going to be our feelings, other people’s opinions, or God? Sometimes we are worshiping our feelings and we don’t even know it! Have you ever had a pity party for yourself? That is an act of worship. You are bowing down to your feelings instead of God. Have you ever rehearsed over and over words of “death” someone spoke into your life? That is the worship of another person’s opinion.
I had such a shame-based identity that developed at a very young age that I began to believe I was not a good person. God came to me and began to change my entire thinking. I believe that is what He wants to do with you as well.
What do you think a life free from shame looks like?
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Psalm 3:8 says, “From the Lord comes deliverance.”
Psalm 34:19 says, “A righteous man may have troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all.”
Are you still troubled over some level of sexual sin from your past? Perhaps you still have not forgiven yourself from an abortion you had years ago. If you are still tortured by shameful thoughts from choices such as these, have you asked God to deliver you from them? I want you to know that He desires to!
Why do you think you find it difficult to get over shameful things from your past?
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When it comes to shame, I believe we do one of two things. We choose to wear it as a heavy coat and allow Satan to continue to abuse us with shameful thoughts, or we decide to ignore his shameful accusations, follow truth and desire to be set free from it.
For years, I wore the coat of shame and kept all of the horrible feelings to myself. I can remember confessing the sin to God but I kept the shame hidden inwardly. Even after I revealed my sin to God I still felt I had to wear the coat of shame because I felt I wasn’t worthy of forgiveness. I later came to realize I was being prideful. Who am I not to forgive myself if God can forgive me? In essence what I was saying was that even though God could forgive me I was too big not to. I was acting bigger than my God.
Because of the unforiveness towards myself, I was giving the enemy continual power in my life.
Do you struggle with forgiving yourself? Why do you think it’s hard to forgive yourself?
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Do you believe that there has been sin in your life that is too big for God to forgive?
Please read 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” What does that say to you about any sin you still carry around with you?
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We need to confess our unforgiveness towards ourselves and ask God to forgive us for it! We need to believe as scripture tells us that nothing is too hard for Him! We need to get in agreement with God that His Son’s blood that was shed was enough to cover our sins. We need to walk in the truth and trust we are forgiven even when we don’t feel like we are. Feelings are not always to be trusted. We need to resist the temptations to receive shame from others and choose to walk in truth. It can be a reality, sisters.
Okay, earlier I told you we would need a large shovel. I hope you remembered to bring it. Pick it up and walk with me to the grave of Lazarus in scripture. While I was studying and researching scriptures trying to understand why women carry such shame from sexual sin, God led me to a scripture that became so real to me I think of it all the time now. Please take the time to read John 11:38-44.
In this chapter, Jesus went to raise Lazarus from the dead. When God called Lazarus to come out of the tomb, He said in verse 43, “Lazarus, come out!” It goes on to say in verse 44 that “the dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen and cloth around his face. Jesus said to them, take off the grave clothes and let him go.” When I read that last part I felt the Holy Spirit whisper something like this to me, “My daughter, take off YOUR grave clothes. Why are you still walking around in them? You have died to your old self! I came and set you free from death and you are still choosing to walk around in those dirty old clothes to show everyone you are not worthy! Now, I say to you, take them off!”
When I heard this in my heart, I was stunned. I realized that I had still been wearing those “grave clothes” or filthy rags of shame. Jesus was commanding me to take them off. Are you still wearing grave clothes? Some of you are still walking around with them on. It’s time to take them off. Grab your shovels and begin to dig. Some of your holes may need to be bigger than others, that is okay! I would assume mine might be the biggest hole of all in order to hold all of my shameful old grave clothes. After you dig that hole, dump all of your grave clothes in it and bury them. Pack the dirt in firmly; I don’t want any of those old skeletons inhabiting your grave clothes to have any opportunity to get out! Sisters, we were meant to wear garments of praise! Can someone shout “Hallelujah”?!
As I was studying the scriptures, I came to another one that spoke such truth over me. Allow me to share it with you. Please read Colossians 3:12. “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” What God was saying to me was to take off those old grave clothes and put on the new clothes. Think about when you have on an outfit that gets dirty. When you change into clean clothes you feel better. It’s the same thing spiritually.
Ephesians 4:22 says, “You were taught , with regards to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” God is telling us to take off the old and put on the new. Are you still walking around wearing those grave clothes that stink with shame? As you get ready for the day, which clothes do you pull off the hanger? God is calling you to take them off! His Son’s blood was enough for you. You don’t have to wear them anymore. They represent death. If you are walking in God’s forgiveness you have died to your old self and Jesus has raised you to walk in a new life. My hope is that you took them off and buried them three paragraphs ago! Go ahead and clothe yourself with some new ones and go show them off!
Sisters, we have got to get this one right. We have got to take off those old smelly things and get rid of them for good. God came to set you free so that you would not have to wear them. As a matter of fact, He has already set you free. It’s a matter of whether you will receive the freedom He has given you. If you are struggling with unforgiveness towards yourself I would like to invite you to do the following. It may take several days or months. Forgiveness is a choice. It may be something you have to do daily until you feel a change.
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Recognize you are holding yourself hostage to shame through unforgiveness.
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Confess your unforgiveness to God.
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Repent. Choose to say out loud for however long it takes, “I choose to let go of all unforgiveness towards myself over my sin. I choose to forgive myself and receive God’s freedom He came to give me.”
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Confess each day, “I forgive myself. I love myself and I am worthy because God says I am.” As the famous words of Stuart Smalley used to say on Saturday Night Live, “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggonit people like me.” What he said has a lot of merit to it! I crack myself up sometimes with that one!
He knew you needed a Savior, dear one. He knew every mistake you would ever make and still chose to give His life up for you so that you might be saved and set free from the old law. Don’t walk around under the old law; He set you free from that! Hallelujah!
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